Stitch Fix Review #1

Happy March everyone!

I know this is a bit different from my typical blog posts but since infertility treatments are on hiatus you get a nice little Stitch Fix review. Are you lazy like I am when it comes to fashion? I hate shopping and I always end up hating what I come home with. It’s hard for me to think of what goes together when I’m not in the comfort of my own closet.

If you haven’t already heard of Stitch Fix here is the low down: You sign up and build your style profile at stitchfix.com and set up a delivery date for your box. You then pay a $20 styling fee and one of their stylists hand picks 5 items for you and include style cards with ideas on how to wear the items. They carry clothes, jewelry, accessories and handbags and I believe you can choose to receive just clothes if you’d like. Oh I don’t want to forget to mention that you don’t get charged for any of the items until you go back to the website and check out to tell them what items you sent back and which ones you kept. And the $20 styling fee is taken off your purchase. If you get all 5 items then you get your $20 taken off as well as a 25% discount! Woot woot! You can even send them the link to your Pinterest page or other social media sites to give them an idea of your style. I used my Pinterest and followed the Stitch Fix page, so I got to pick out dream outfits for them to see as well as pin my favorite Stitch Fix items in stock. And if you decide you’d like to do this for yourself then I’d love to be your referral, if you order a box then I get a $25 credit! Here is that link if you would be ever so kind to use it: https://www.stitchfix.com/referral/4745150

I was excited all week in suspense of receiving my Fix. It was like Christmas morning tracking it and receiving it on Saturday.

Stitchboxstylist card

First, I opened the Market & Spruce Aleah Heather V-Neck Dolman Top- $48

v-neck dolman

I liked the top a lot. The fabric is soft and a good quality. I like the length of the shirt and it’s very versatile. It can be worn to the gym for yoga or to dance class, it can be worn with jeans to the store, with a skirt or nice pants for work and it can be dressed up for a night on the town. I am also obsessed with navy blue clothes. My only complaints are that the arms are a little strange I feel like it made me look bigger than I actually am.

Dolman top

Next is the Pixley Larson Crystal Fringe Statement Necklace: $52

I pinned this on Pinterest and my stylist sent it to me! I adore this necklace. But I had no idea that it was so pricey. Now it feels like it’s good quality, I just have never spent over $20 on a necklace before. It was also missing a diamond so I don’t want to buy it. I sent them an email asking what they do in cases like these, can I buy it at a reduced cost or can I get a new one sent to me if I decide I want it?

fringenecklace

Next is the 41Hawthorn Filbert 3/4 Sleeve Popover Blouse: $58

popover blouse

This is one of my favorite styles in a shirt. My husband commented about how this is my style and I completely agree. On the downside it’s $58 and the fabric wrinkles easily. It is awfully cute, though.

Dolman top 2 Dolman top 3

Next is the Market & Spruce Alan French Terry Asymmetrical Zip Cardigan- $68

zipcardigan

I also pinned this on my Pinterest and I was thrilled to see my stylist sent it to me in black. The fabric is thick, soft and durable. It is incredibly comfortable and it has freakin pockets! It is cute zipped up and unzipped and it can be casual or fancy.

asymmetrical cardi 2                           Asymmetrical cardi

And last but not least are the Margaret M Emer Polka Dot Print High Waisted Cropped Pant: $98

emerpolkadotpantIt took me a while to love these pants. The material makes a swish sound when you walk. It reminds me of the episode of Seinfeld where Costanza bought a cheap suit thinking he got a good deal, only to realize he made a swooshing noise when he walked. They also don’t have any buttons or clasps, they are pull on with a stretchy waist band and I thought that was odd. I got Mediums sent to me and they may be a tad too big because they are longer than I’d like for them to be and a little more loose in the waist and in the calves than I’d like for them to be. I love them now after trying them on with several different things but here are my qualms: I don’t 98 dollars love them. If I’m going to spend a hundred bucks on pants they better fit me to perfection. And I worry about the polka dot print, I’m a psycho and would only want to wear solids on the top if the bottoms are textured/printed. I just don’t have that many tops that would go with them.

polka dot pants 2 polka dot pants 3 polka dot pants

My overall review, I loved my first fix! I hate that I loved it so much because I only planned on buying one item and now I can’t decide. Which ones are your favorite? Please send me any and all feedback, I need help!

Oh and I promise I’m not getting paid by Stitch Fix to say these things. But please do use my referral link to order your own box! Here is that link again: https://www.stitchfix.com/referral/4745150

No Disease or Divorce

First of all, sorry the title isn’t all chocolates and roses. It will make sense later, I promise. 🙂

I hope everyone had a wonderful Valentine’s Day! It came at the perfect time for Josh and I. We were starting to get into a slump. I don’t know if it’s just because we are in a weird period in our lives right now (with not being in a cycle or having much hope for a baby), if it’s just too cold and dreary outside, if Josh is just incredibly busy with growing his business or if it’s just normal for marriages to ebb and flow. Though I am pretty sure it’s a united mix of all the above. Needless to say, I was slapped in the face with the reality that I wasn’t doing enough as a wife to show my love and appreciation for my favorite person on Earth. Side note: sorry for all the anecdotes in this post, but I promise they are relevant!

First, one of my blogging friends started her new blog that will chronicle her new single life after infertility. I got her first post recently and that hit me hard, I really feel for her. Mostly because it terrifies me that this will happen to Josh and I. She seems to be doing pretty great and seems to have come to an understanding as to why things haven’t worked out for her in the past. She has met a man who has the same wants and desires as her and her life seems to be falling into place. Of course I am happy for her but I always worry and wonder if this is why Josh and I don’t have children yet. Are we still childless because we aren’t supposed to be together? I love Josh and I feel he is the perfect man for me but I pray that God doesn’t have other plans.

A few years ago, my cousin and her husband had difficulty getting pregnant and she had some exploratory surgery to figure out why they weren’t conceiving. And that’s when the doctor found her cancer. My belief is that had she not had infertility she wouldn’t have caught her cancer so quickly. Infertility may have just saved her life. And if you don’t know Guiliana Rancic, she and her husband tried for years to have a baby. When they went to do IVF with a new doctor he required her to do a lot of testing to be sure she was healthy enough to have a child, one of those tests was a mammogram and they soon found out she had breast cancer. So infertility may have just saved her life as well. I also hear of a lot of other stories where a husband and wife are infertile, they split up and end up easily having children with their new spouses. That is bittersweet, tragic in that they split up but serendipitous that they both ended up happy in the end.

Lord, whatever plans you have brewing up there, please no disease and please no divorce!

The aforementioned new blog is probably the reason for my nightmare the night before Valentine’s Day. All the details have faded away but the gist was that Josh wanted a divorce and he hated me! I woke up all sweaty and crying, it was so vivid and I was for sure it was real until I was awake for a few minutes. Needless to say, I was determined to make Valentine’s Day very important. I had this great idea that truly belonged to Josh: a few weeks ago I was looking at these cute Valentine’s decorated Rice Krispie treats online and I showed them to Josh. A few days later I came home to this cute basket full of all the ingredients I would need to make the scrumptious treats I so desired. treatsI was a bit lazy and only decorated a few but Josh had made a few comments about how much he loved the ones with icing on them. The rest went bad sitting there for a week, so I woke up super early Valentine’s Day (8am is early for me on a Saturday) and got the ingredients to make more for Josh. I made them and put them in my car for most of the day until I could sneak off into the closet and cut them out with cookie cutters and decorate them. Here is the finished product:

valentines day

I knew he would love the taste of the treats and the thought put into them. But I knew he would mostly appreciate me being chill and relaxed for our Valentine’s date. I love to control things, like…a lot, so it was quite unbelievable that we headed out to our Valentine’s dinner with no reservations. Eeeek! But all ended up working out well. We went to our favorite restaurant but it had an hour and 45 minute wait so we left. We drove around to a few more places and no one had anything available for an hour or more. We came up with the idea to go to a little gem called the Bistro. I called in and it sounded promising and when we arrived another couple had just left the bar so we got seated immediately. They had a Valentine’s Day special: choice of soup or salad and bacon wrapped filet medallions with gorgonzola butter sauce and mashed potatoes and a dessert to share. It was delicious and perfect. And things can work out when they aren’t obsessed over in every single detail, go figure.

Josh got me some beautiful flowers (that looked a lot like my wedding bouquet), cotton candy, cherry Chapstick and Skittles. The man knows me well, y’all. When I woke up that morning I could also see that he planned on making a cute scavenger hunt out of it. My gifts, a card and post its were strewn all over the counter top and my skittles had a note on them that said “this is the first of the riddle, to find your next present, go find the griddle” and he was asleep on the couch with a half eaten bowl of Beefaroni. I could just see it and his attention deficit, he set it all out, wrote about the griddle and realized he was hungry, made food and fell asleep. When he woke up that morning he just went “No, Dammit!” It was the thought that counts anyway.

flowers

So I’d say we had a successful Valentine’s Day and I hope to continue my appreciation and thoughtfulness in our marriage. And I will continue to be thankful to God, give him the control and pray that He has the best laid plans I could ever imagine.

Best wishes,

Kacy

 

 

Empathy vs Sympathy

So what exactly is empathy?

I was reminded of a video called “The Power of Empathy” by Dr. Brené Brown that I’d like to share with all of you. It is a great description of how to use empathy with others. We talk a lot on these infertility blogs about people being insensitive but I think that people truly do care, but just don’t know how to show empathy. This may be a good way to educate our friends and family about how to be there for us.

I hope you enjoy and learn something new.

Best wishes,

Kacy

 

Parent Guilt

The Monday after Christmas my brother-in-law came over to the house to watch a football game. Our dog, Izzie is always incredibly excited to see her Uncle Jordan and she runs around in circles and yelps in excitement. This time she did just the same and when she jumped on the couch she began to wail in pain. I rushed to her side and noticed she wasn’t touching her back right foot to the ground. She was no longer in pain but limped everywhere. Josh took her to the vet the next day and they told us she tore her ACL. Damn it.

We were told she would need surgery and it would cost roughly $2,000. As if the money wasn’t a big enough issue we were also told that she wouldn’t be able to walk excessively, run, jump or climb stairs for at least 8 weeks, ideally 12. She went in for surgery that Friday morning, it was successful and I praised God for that. I constantly have anxiety about something bad happening to my babies so I had convinced myself that something was going to go terribly wrong.

We were given some pain medication, antibiotics and a sedative to keep her calm and “quiet”, meaning she has to be pretty much still outside of potty breaks. She also has to wear a cone due to her being lick happy on the 9 staples she now has on her knee. The first few days were okay, I hated that she was so out of it but it was easy for her to keep still since she was still recovering from surgery. But come Monday she wanted to be able to follow me around all over the house again and chase every noise outside. It has been really difficult to have an eye on her every second. I also never realized until this past week that she is constantly moving around and she always has to be wherever I am. Which means I just carry her everywhere now. I don’t have the heart to leave her in her cage for most of the day. The surgeon also said not to do that if she thrashes around in the cage because it can do just as much damage. Which she does. Lucky us.

But it seems like I can’t do anything right with her. If I sit her down for a second to put my shoes on to take her outside she slips on the tile and falls. If I give her slack on the leash outside she takes off running. If I take my eye off her a second to answer a phone call she jumps off the damn couch. If I even so much as pee I have to put her in her cage or give her to Josh to watch. Josh does this all day as he works from home, by the way. I told a friend that we basically have a newborn that can get up and walk. Not to mention the emotional pain from forcing my once active dog to be still and calm when all she wants to do is be a dog. She doesn’t understand why she can’t do anything.

I feel so guilty about everything. I have even wished I didn’t have her as a dog because she has had so many health issues. And it doesn’t help that Josh is pointing out everything that I do wrong with her. Is this what being a parent will be like all the time? If so, I don’t know if I want to or can do it. That’s the thing about having to spend thousands to have your own kiddos, you really think a lot about whether or not it is worth it. I can’t help but wonder if this is why we haven’t been given our own children yet. Maybe we would be really bad parents. It has only been a week and we are already criticizing each other non-stop and wanting to strangle each other we are so stressed. One week down, 7 to go.

cone

Pray for us,

Kacy

 

 

December Photo Challenge Completed!

Decemberphotochallenge

I must admit it was pretty difficult to complete this challenge. December is insanely busy. In retrospect I should’ve chosen a more boring month, like January or February. But it’s neither here nor there. Here are my pictures for the month!

Day 1: Me!

Me

Day 2: Peace. I am just obsessed with my Christmas tree and ornaments!

Peace

Day 3: Heal. I chose this one because I was lifting weights while lying down and this silly goose came and stood on my stomach. I was cracking up and just completely happy.

Heal

Day 4: Tree

Tree

Day 5: Party. I chose party for the day because I knew my work Christmas party was today. Josh and I had a great time!

Party

Day 6: Family. I just love them.

Family

Day 7: Season. Tis the season to decorate the mantle! Seriously, it looks so naked now that the decorations are gone.

Season

Day 8: Favorite. I love when winter comes because then little gem gets to come out! It has to be my favorite smell.

Favorite

Day 9: Festive. This is my neighbor’s house and he does a great job decorating it every year. The lights change colors, sometimes they are green, sometimes red, sometimes multi-colored and some days each light changes colors, like on this day.

Festive

Day 10: Gratitude. I am so thankful for this handsome, loving man. This picture is from the Christmas party, so I cheated a little.

Gratitiude

Day 11: Sweater. Look at my little shoogie in her sweater.

Sweater

Day 12: Heart. I know that Izzie gets on here two days in a row but it just so happened that her birthday is December 12th.

Heart

Day 13: Give. I love buying presents and I love wrapping them to be incredibly pretty!

Give

Day 14: Merry. I get so excited to work around Christmas and other holidays because of art projects. I love going to Michael’s and getting crafts for half off!

Merry

Day 15: Sparkle. Just some more Christmas decor.

Sparkle

Day 16: Lights. Here is the outside of our house. Josh can put lights on a bush like no other.

Lightschallenge

Day 17: Calm. I worked with these 3 wonderful ladies for my first full-time job out of college. It has been 5 years since I have worked with them but we try to meet up quarterly for dinner. And we can talk for hours and hours. They are some great, supportive friends and I will cherish them forever. They all have the heart of a social worker and for that we are soul mates. 🙂

Calm

Day 18: Home. We didn’t buy it brand new and we didn’t build it with our own hands but we built it with our dreams and hard work.

Home

Day 19: Night. I love walking the dogs at night this time of year. It doesn’t matter how many Christmas lights I look at, it will never be enough.

Night

Day 20: Silver. Okay so it’s white gold but it looks silver. I still get butterflies every time I look at my ring. Josh picked it out with the help of my cousin!

Silver

Day 21: Decorate

Decorate

Day 22: Tradition. I have to watch this movie every year for Christmas. I usually watch it while I’m wrapping presents. “I feel it in my fingers, I feel it in my toes.”

Tradition

Day 23: Patience. I have to take Provera for 10 days and wait for my cycle to start to meet with the doc. Infertility is always about waiting.

Patient

Day 24: Jolly. Here’s my cousin, my Aunt, my Mom and I on Christmas Eve.

Jolly

Day 25: Christmas or Holiday. I can’t believe I didn’t take one picture of family on Christmas day.

Christmas

Day 26: Cozy. I feel the most cozy cuddling with my girls or Josh on our sectional in the living room.

Cozy

Day 27: Boots.

Boots

Day 28: Winter Wonderland. Lucky for me it snowed the day before.

Winter Wonderland

Day 29: Celebrate. The snowman is definitely celebrating something.

celebrate

Day 30: Resolution. My resolution for 2015 is to dance more and give more time to hobbies.

Resolution

Day 31: New Year’s Eve. I did pretty good and then I forgot all about the New Year’s Eve picture! So here’s one from the internet.

2014, you were a pretty difficult year, our most difficult yet. You were a huge hurdle our life. There were still many positive things about you but I am very glad we are moving forward.

goodbye-2014-welcome-2015-568x426Have a Happy New Year, all!

Kacy

December Photo Challenge

Decemberphotochallenge

Please join me and Laura at Making Baby Provence in our December Photo Challenge! I will be doing it daily and posting it on my Instagram account (1stcomesloveblog). I will also share it here on the blog periodically, similar to how I did for the October Photo-a-Day Challenge. I understand life gets busy sometimes so I may also share a few days at the same time. I don’t like to be on social media on a daily basis anyhow. So, if you would like to join please feel free to do so in any way that you choose. Just use the word prompts for the day as literally or figuratively as you wish! Some days you may feel more creative than others. But I would love to see what you all come up with. So follow me on Instagram or send me your blog posts if you post them there! I tried to make it universal to all religions and holidays but I am only familiar with Christmas traditions.

What to Say When Someone Loses a Child

I just wanted to share this blog post from Scribbles and Crumbs. I know that my loss may not be comparable to those who had a child that was born and died or to those who miscarried in later weeks but there are so many of us out there who can relate. And I know of many caring people who would want to know how to best love a person who has experienced such a tragic loss.